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June 08, 2005
The Hosepipe Effect
I got a great laugh today at The Daily Linguini, reading about the host's experiences with a newborn son, and what can happen while trying to change his nappy/diaper. I've excerpted the money quote...
But nobody warns you about the Hosepipe Effect.Oh, I know, people say, "It's not like changing little girls, you know, he'll wee on you if you're not careful." But we are bloody careful, alright, dammit? They make it sound like there's some warning, or that it's a case of grab-some-cotton-wool-and-on-with-the-mopping. But no. The only warning you get is a brief nanosecond when his eyes cross slightly and he gets this momentary perplexed expression, and then this godalmighty jet of warm wee hits you between the eyes, with enough force to propel you into the wardrobe unless you're holding onto something solid, and then... the Hosepipe Effect kicks in, and suddenly the damn thing is going PSSSSSHHHHHHH all over the change mat, the cot, your duvet, your wife, your nice work clothes you've just finished ironing, and the gargantuan pile of spare baby clothes you've lugged upstairs for when he wets himself.
Tomorrow, we're buying him some crocodile clips.
Posted by adrian at June 8, 2005 03:04 PM
Comments
Hey, thanks for the plug! ;) And yes, he's still doing it. The crocodile clips weren't strong enough, so we're going to try an industrial vice.
Posted by: pastamasta ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.kabedford.com/nav-commenters.gif)
at June 8, 2005 04:02 PM
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